"How Are You Still Single?"

hOw ArE yOu sTiLl SiNgLe?

On behalf of all single people everywhere, PLEASE stop asking us this!

Sure, I get you are intending it to be a compliment. It means you find us attractive/nice enough to be worthy of love. But we all know the subtext of that question is:

WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!

There is always a moment of silence after the question is delivered where you can sense their internal dialogue being something along the lines of, ‘she must be a crazy bitch’. All while they eye you up, clearly scanning for physical deformities that may be concealed by your clothing.

Like yup, I’m actually completely covered in scales under here!

I've been single for a while now, so unfortunately, I get asked this on the reg. I'm still working on a clever response.

When I met someone while unattached in my twenties, the response was always ‘Oh, you have PLENTY of time’ or ‘Don’t ever settle!’.

Revealing I am single in my thirties gets me this reaction:

And the "never settles" have become "don't be so picky!".

Not only do I apparently need to lower my standards, other people have now lowered their standards for me.

I recently told a girlfriend that I googled a prospective date (don't act like you don't) only to discover that he had been arrested for theft and drugs. Her response was, "Well, what kind of drugs was it?.

Then there's the pity you get for being single in your thirties... People genuinely seem sad for you! Add in the fact that I own a cat and I am pretty much walking through life like Cersei in Game of Thrones, with people yelling "shame!" after me.

Yes, I have dreams and goals to live a beautiful, fulfilled life. And that dream does include a husband and a family. But this is what I've learned:

To live the life of your dreams, you have to love and appreciate the life you live now, FIRST.

And I really do! I have the most amazing family, friends, coworkers and yes, cat.

Adding a man would just be the cherry on top of an already delicious sundae.

So don't you worry about me. Or my fellow singletons. The universe is cookin' something very special up for us. : )

XX

A.