Shut-Up Haters With This Quote

Oh just me and my besties, Brene Brown & Oprah.

Something you should know about me: I am an over-sharer.

I will tell pretty much anything to pretty much anyone.

I would probably tell the mailman how I lost my virginity if he ever gave me the window.

And yet, when I went to hit the PUBLISH button on my first blog post eight months ago I think I literally stopped breathing.

I was suddenly fearful of what the reaction would be to sharing such a personal look at my life - especially since not even my closest friends knew I was starting a blog.

They were all amazing of course, immediately cheering me on, commending my courage and sweetly re-posting the blog to their Facebook pages.

Even my boss gave me a thumbs-up at the office the next day for it and my coworkers were all singing the its praises at lunch.

The best part though, was that I received several messages from people I wasn't super close with - some I didn't know at all - telling me how much they enjoyed the blog and how glad they were to know they weren't the only ones who hadn't quite figured their life out just yet.

And yet somehow, despite all the fabulous feedback, a few minor negative comments (or lack of comments at all) from people close to me totally killed my vibe.

"I don't get it."

"What's the point of this?"

"What the hell is a blog?"

"Are you just trying to be insta-famous?"

"You're not making money from this."

"No really, what the f*ck is a blog?"

Now don't get me wrong, I totally get that putting yourself out there publicly opens you up to criticism. And I am not naive enough to think that me, my appearance and my writing style will be everyone's cup of tea, but the negativity I was mentally braced for was from strangers. You know, nameless, faceless people that only have the balls to tear someone they don't know down from behind a computer screen. I did NOT expect it from people I loved. I haven't even had enough exposure to get ridiculed by a stranger yet!

So just like that all the nerve I had worked up to get this thing goin' was gone. I became completely self-conscious about sharing my life online.

I know what you are thinking. Those comments weren't even that bad. The truth is, I think the reason they affected my confidence so deeply was because I was secretly asking myself the same things.

I was able to squeeze out two more posts before completely recoiling and going radio silent for six months.

---

Another thing you should know about me: I LOVE Oprah.

The Oprah Winfrey show was a part of my daily routine all through middle/high school.

Rush home. Eat a snack. Make sure the latest Britney Spears video made the TRL countdown. Eat another snack. Watch Oprah.

I swear that program raised my emotional intelligence.

I felt a void when it went off the air but that was recently filled when I discovered her podcast series.

I knew I had found the mother-load of aha moments. I mean, Oprah pretty much invented them. She probably has the phrase trademarked. (I just googled - she does!)

So it didn't surprise me that it didn't take long ( 4 minutes and 46 seconds into the first episode to be exact) before I had my first aha moment.

It came from hearing a Teddy Roosevelt quote shared by the insanely intelligent & well-spoken interviewee: Research Professor and best-selling author, Dr. Brene Brown.

It had given her the comfort she needed after reading some super cruel comments written by a hoard of nasty internet trolls on her 2010 TED Talk (which I highly recommend watching BT-dubs.)

The quote goes like this...

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.

Loosely translated:

Unless you are brave enough to be doing what you are judging me on, SHUT THE F*CK UP.

And just like that, this Blonde Sponge got her groove back. : )

So here's the deal:

I don't know what my end game is.

I could not care less about my number of followers but I'm trying to get exposure here, so hey - the more the merrier!

I don't know if I will ever make money from this. And I don't care.

& Quite frankly, I don't even know what a blog is!

But to reach even a single soul to let them know they aren't the only ones feeling a little lost in this big, crazy world.. then it's more than worth it.

XX

A