Hello. My name is Annie and I am lazy.
There. I said it.
I’ve been a pretty closeted lazy person my whole life. I am super productive at work. I’m always up for anything when I am with my friends. But in the privacy of my own home, cloaked in one of my (many) bathrobes, I am one of THE. LAZIEST. PEOPLE. ALIVE.
Here's another little tidbit about me: I’m big on lists.
I always have a list of things I intend to do.
vacuum
clean bathroom
grocery shop
workout
return clothes that have been sitting in the bag for 3 months
work on this blog etc.
And yet somehow, when I come home from work, ready to tackle my list, I always tell myself I deserve to relax a little first. Just kick my feet up and watch a quick show...
BIG MISTAKE.
Now this is where I’d like to blame Netflix…
Sure one little show never killed anyone. But Netflix's whole 'let’s automatically play the next episode thing' is really not helpful for a gal with my condition.
That 10 second countdown before it queues up the next one is simply not enough time to talk myself out of my ‘well, just ONE more’ mentality.
Then there’s the fact that Netflix so thoughtfully recommends things they think I’d like.
Thanks, Netflix but what I really need is a recommendation to get off my ass and fold the laundry that I’ve re-dried 4 times.
The next thing I know it’s been 3.5 hours, I'm on the verge of developing bed sores from not moving, my brain hurts from simultaneously staring at the TV and my phone, and not one thing has been checked off my list.
Then comes the lie that I and many others always tell ourselves… ‘I’ll do it tomorrow’.
I’ve said that about working out and eating healthier every day for the last 5 months and my ten lb weight gain is a testament to how well that’s worked.
Now I’d also like to blame the #selfcare movement.
In the last year we had the emergence of the phrase "self-care". The whole world was suddenly saying “Treat yo self” and I was all about it. I was feeling encouraged that my nights spent curled up on the couch in a face-mask, thumbing through Cosmo when I should be working on my summer body was acceptable.
I think the target audience of the self-care promoters are the workaholics that truly never take any time for themselves. Not the Annie’s of the world, who have been caring for themselves a little TOO much.
I started slipping into a deep, dark, wine & Netflix fueled funk.
And then my brother moved in.
He asked to crash at my place for a little while he was in between two apartments. I thought having a spectator to the fact that I had become one with my couch would motivate me but I was too far gone.
I was mortified to have someone behind the curtain to see that behind the fun-loving, go-getter I was with my friends and coworkers, I was a total blob.
One day during a tiff with my brother, (the ugly kind of fight only close relatives have) he said it.
He called me lazy.
It's always the insults that ring true that sting the most.
Hearing it said aloud triggered something in me.
I have too much I want to accomplish to be acting like this.
Life is too damn short to spend it glued to the TV - no matter how good a murder documentary may be.
Okay, so I had my wake-up call but how to change?
I told myself "Just do it".
Y'all, there's a reason Nike hasn't changed it's slogan in 30 years. It's pretty damn effective. You can think of dozens of reasons not to do something, JUST F*CKING DO IT.
I also listened to an episode of Jenna Kutcher's Goal Digger podcast that focused on increasing productivity. (If you're not familiar with her podcast I highly recommend it - they pretty much hit every demographic: photographers, aspiring entrepreneurs, moms and then girls like me that just want to be the biggest badass version of themselves.)
The episode offered several good insights (including one interesting theory about scheduling tasks around your monthly visit from Aunt Flo... seriously) but I was stuck on this quote they shared: "If you want something done, give it to a busy person."
Yessss, that was so true! When you have a bunch on your plate that you really have to do, a momentum is created. You just make it happen.
I thought of how I magically transformed into Mr. Clean on crack when someone tells me they are dropping by on short notice.
It also described how I operate at work. In the office I thrive on being pushed to the max.
So lately I have been trying to implement that at home. I tell myself that everything is mandatory, instead of my usual, 'ehhh that can wait' attitude.
I've also been chunking things into time brackets. (Workout from 7:00-8, do a load of laundry from 8:00-8:30 etc).
Keeping myself on a set schedule at home, like I would at work has helped me stay more accountable.
And I'm not a total psycho - I haven't cut out TV completely. Now I simply schedule it in.
Or I use it as a reward tactic as If I was a toddler. I say to myself 'If you finish that hour workout you can watch a little Bravo before bed'.
It's been weeks since I made these little tweaks in attempt to get my shit together and I gotta tell ya, it feels SO good not to be a bum.
I have more energy, I dropped a few lbs and most importantly I don't have that pit in my stomach when I go to bed from knowing I wasted another night of my life.
Full disclosure: I'm not completely reformed.. I'll still curl up with a blanket and a face mask for a good Netflix binge here and there but hey, #selfcare, baby!
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